Since I have been practicing over 35 years as a medically trained divorce attorney and mediator, I have had an amazing array of clients from business owners to therapists to celebrities. Regardless of your position in life, mediation provides efficiency, privacy, is cost-effective and puts you in control!
About 9 months ago, an up and coming plastic surgeon contacted me for a consultation. He and his wife had been married 11 years, had 2 children, and they lived both in New York City and Connecticut.
His wife was a high profile online food influencer, and her husband was fed up with what he called her "financial excesses." She spent a lot of money on designer clothes for the children and had redecorated their family home 7 times in 11 years. Although he was finally becoming a highly sought after plastic surgeon, he was not happy with paying for the extravagant lifestyle his wife had created. Even though she was also earning a lot of money as a food influencer, she was spending all of his money and saving hers.
They were also in a lot of debt, totaling $156,000, their children were being spoiled, and as a family they were very unhappy. He felt she was irresponsible and had spoken with her many times. They even tried a therapist and nothing was working. He felt he couldn’t stay married anymore, and he told her he was very unhappy.
As is standard in these cases, the wife initially wanted to hire a lawyer. The husband was impressed by what he had heard about my unique meditation process from an attorney and his wife that had successfully used my mediation process for their divorce. After our conversation, he was eager to share my mediation approach with his wife.
Honestly, at first I wasn’t sure mediation would work for them. They were fighting a lot. During our initial meeting, I really had to keep them focused once his wife finally agreed to try mediation. The wife was super angry, especially because she felt her husband wanted out of the marriage because he had let his ego go to his head, and he wanted a younger woman. She shared her suspicion with me during one of our individual mediation sessions.
It turned out her financial recklessness really had worn on the husband and he wouldn’t stay in this marriage any more. This deterioration had been going on for quite some time. He felt very disrespected and didn’t feel she was a team player in their marriage. They both worked with therapists from my roster of experts to help them each get a grip on personal issues they needed to address to move forward.
As the divorce process continued, they settled in to the rhythm of my psychologically based mediation process, the anger subsided, and they were able to engage in productive conversations and make thoughtful decisions.
The husband was fair, and agreed to help with the debts although his wife had generated most of them.
It was important for them to consider mediation for many reasons but in particular, it helped them keep their privacy while divorcing, which could have erupted onto front-page news with the wife being a high-profile food influencer if they had litigated their matter. Not to mention what negative publicity could do to the husband’s image as an up and coming plastic surgeon. Cost was also a consideration given their family’s struggle with financial problems and debt.
The final outcome was fair. The split of the assets was equitable. The management of the debts was reasonable. The custody, support, and visitation with the children was decided on thoughtfully.
This couple has just received their judgment of divorce and, the family is adjusting to their new lives. Their judgment of divorce was received pretty quickly considering it could have taken years if they had litigated their matter.
There is life after divorce. The path you choose to get there can make all the difference!
If you are thinking of divorce and have questions about mediation and how it can help you, call me. We can explore together what is possible.
Why choose mediation?
- Efficiency: Mediation often resolves faster than traditional court proceedings, letting you focus on what you do best.
- Privacy: Keep your personal matters confidential. Mediation provides a discreet alternative to public court hearings.
- Cost-Effective: Mediation typically costs significantly less than traditional divorce litigation.
- Control: Have a say in the outcome. Mediation offers you and your spouse the opportunity to shape the terms of your divorce, rather than leaving decisions solely in the hands of the court.
Call me now to schedule a consultation! 212.734.1551
I look forward to speaking with you.
Warm regards,
Lois
Call New York Divorce Attorney Lois Brenner to learn more about her unique psychologically based divorce mediation process.
Why spend many, many thousands of dollars on a court battle when you can work things out without lawyers and judges, discreetly, quickly, and all the while saving money.
Schedule your consultation today! Call 212.734.1551